ROXANA KARIMI, LMFT
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How to Care For a Human
A blog on the psycho-spiritual-emotional-physical aspects of the human experience. 

Signs and Types of Emotionally Immature Parents

12/27/2022

2 Comments

 
Think you grew up with emotionally immature parents?

Keep reading to see if your experience compares to the common signs.
I know it may feel alarming or bring up feelings of resentment, but I want you to remember one thing: GENERATIONAL WOUNDS. Parents who are emotionally immature are wounded children. They are letting their wounded inner child run the show. And that sucks.

You know what would suck even more? If you let it run your life or pass it on to future generations. Instead you can feel the feelings of the impact and then take responsibility and heal.


SIGNS YOU GREW UP WITH EMOTIONALLY IMMATURE PARENTS:
  • You feel emotionally alone with them
  • Their feelings and needs come first
  • They don't communicate with your directly but expect you to pick up on cues (HENCE THE EMPATH CHILD)
  • They don't respect your emotions, boundaries, autonomy, or individuality
  • They use guilt and shame to get their needs met
  • You carry the emotional work of the relationship
  • You were a parentified child - left to fend for yourself, take care of siblings, and the parent
  • They deflate your dreams and shut you down
  • You feel mentally and emotionally trapped
  • They are highly reactive, unapologetic, and cannot be vulnerable with you
  • They avoid personal responsibility and blame others
  • They struggle to validate your feelings resulting in you feeling misunderstood, ignored, not worthy of love
  • They are ruled by their emotions and go from love bombing to withdrawing love or giving silent treatment
  • They are often controlling -operating from projections and wounded inner child, they need you to fit in with their idea of self
  • They make their children responsible for their happiness or sadness
  • Everything is about them, "why can't you love me" or "now I'm a bad parent?"
  • They don't encourage you trying new things or grow

TYPES OF EMOTIONALLY IMMATURE PARENTS:

  • Emotional: These parents are ruled by their emotions, highly reactive when triggered, swing from love bombing to love withdrawing.
  • Driven- These parents are hyper-focused on goals & goal-oriented activities. They have high and unrealistic expectations and keep everyone busy.
  • Passive - These parents are disengaged, avoid difficult topics and conversations. They usually rely on the more dominant parent to take charge and minimize problems.
  • Rejecting- These parents have little interest in their children. They have little tolerance of others needs and focus on their own.

Your trauma was not your fault but healing is your responsibility.

That doesn't mean you have to do all on your own. Starting next week you can join a community of healers who are tackling issues just like this with a trained psychotherapist, me.
The Conscious Healing Program helps you unpack your childhood wounds, begin reparenting them, and showing up as the person you were meant to be before all the wounding.

I'm here to support you! Reach out to me via email: rkarimitherapy@gmail.com to get started on healing from the effects of. 

With love, 
​Roxana
2 Comments
Dora Ross link
2/21/2023 11:31:03 am

This is timely with my current situation, I'm currently living with my emotionally immature parents and it greatly affects the relationship that I have with my own family, both mentally and emotionally. Most of the signs mentioned are being characteristics by my parents. They are are self-centered, they care more about themselves rather than my emotional needs and even the needs of my kids. They don't respect my opinion and even that of my husband. They always think of what is best for them and don't even consider my situation. We are currently staying with them at the moment, and I'm hoping to get away soon from them so I can provide care and respect for my own family, something that they missed providing me.

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Rod Shapiro link
3/23/2023 10:23:40 am

Thank you for this article. I strongly agree that emotionally immature parents can unintentionally inflict deep emotional wounds on their children, hindering their growth and development. Seeking the help of a psychotherapist can provide a safe and nurturing space for healing and counseling, helping parents break the cycle of emotional immaturity and improve their relationship with their children. Don't let emotional immaturity stand in the way of your child's well-being and future, seek the help you need today.

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    Roxana Karimi
    LMFT

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